THIS may surprise even average people. When I was a youth, Mexican(Germans, Russians also?) gang members threatened and paid people to BE MORE IMPORTANT than me in a variety of places. Because they did this, I’ve had all kinds of difficulties from being blocked and slandered about. These “hits” never ended. They have crippled me for life in all kinds of places. It means I can’t just “rise up and help others”–it appears it won’t ever, NEVER EVER… happen.
It has been so adverse, I’ve looked like a criminal person at a distance. Someone so “hexed” and “disfavored” that people shouldn’t speak to me for any reason, just stay away. The reality is, I have had such a damaged life… I can’t do much for others. I don’t have money or information that can help people in public. I’ve even been moved around so much I’m not even good for giving people directions to the local bars, cafes, beaches, and more!
Actually really slammed me for decades. I couldn’t get help for myself. I had to stay ruined, damaged, unliked, isolated. Even as recent as 2018… local San Diegan gang members may have taken me out for a craft beer… they drugged me so I looked really stupid in the brew houses.
Again I write these things done because there may be others just like me who can’t speak up or write about it. Still too deep within.