For instance, because I was a fallen person others were able to step up and be bigger than they may have planned on. I am not certain who or when.
Because of my weaknesses, others stood taller and stronger and got things done I could not.
I was not able to know so many people and all the things they have done and are doing. I had to be a “dummy” in the back seat, at home, left behind.
Please remember, because I was the smaller person in so many equations… I had to stay small to allow the big people to do their work. I had to get too small sometimes. It is why retirement… is the placing of someone OUT OF THE PEOPLE MIX. I am OUT. I’ve written there is “a lot of wilderness between me and others”… meaning, I don’t even know who they really are.
Anyone I’ve chatted with in recent decades were MOSTLY SOCIAL CONTACTS. I cannot say I was actively transacting with or for them.
I feel blessed that I got to spend time with some key people. It may have been a long time ago, it may have been in recent decades. It was clear I was too small to get things done for them. They had to do their work and I had to stay out of the way.
I still feel, that originally… I was “licensed” or “given the spirit” of an assistant to the WGA. Meaning, originally I was allowed to speak and thrive around people much bigger than me when I was young. Because of that foundation, I still have perspectives that are abnormal for the average Californian.
What remains of me now? I appear to have re-kindled only the part of me that was “into speaking” yet, it’s only in written words these days. That’s it. I’m not well connected, and I am weakened, soft. I am not prepared now for real work anywhere. I keep bringing this up so people know I am NOT TRYING TO STEAL A JOB somewhere from someone! Okay?
Blessings!
Long ago as I exited, someone else stepped in. I’m not doing much in person these days, so there is nothing to step into.