leadership – Thoughts

I Was Almost Given a Wealthy Husband Full Time in the 1970s+

What happened is gang members took me to a man who was said to be investing in my ideas. More than one tough female told me they WERE NOT GOING TO LET ME GET HIM, THEY WANTED HIM. So what may have happened is, I lost that resource and any potential future ones from that time on. I was very young and why it may have taken me years to come back to that memory. Some of those women may still be alive on Maui, Hawaii. The ones I know about are not wealthy (certainly are more than me though!) themselves. My hunch is the wealthier men gravitated away from those gang members after helping them initially.

It’s very likely I was allowed to get help early on in the 1970s with advanced planning. Just no plan to allow me to be independently wealthy. Really, I’ve looked like just an image of someone bigger*. Someone people could talk with, however it got too dangerous. I got used for many things far beyond my own control. May be why I got so destroyed and ruined. It really burned me earlier in life to see men and women who did not appear that bright or even reliable still being able to own homes, cars, investments and have their own family and many friends and contacts in multiple communities. I hope people remember how much I DID NOT GET in life.

I probably was instrumental(got played) more than an average small town gang leader. Could be why I’m like a damaged military soldier. I’m not missing limbs, however there is still a lot of damage in my body that’s even been repaired more than once. I took a lot of gang hits over time.

I am not certain how things go in other countries. It could very well be I had to stay as small as I am to accommodate real gang leaders locally and far away who are limited in resources. I could not actually get bigger than them without causing a problem. Likely because I am not a real gang leader or gang banger to protect what I have. Some may still be trying to hold me as low or below a MIGRANT LEADERSHIP male or female.

*Meaning there is someone genuinely much bigger, wealthier, better connected that I appear to be very similar to… possibly eavesdropped on for some things. Which may have simply been one of the “Donnas” in the 1970s+. I’ve written there were KNOWN COPY CATS HIRED in Los Angeles, CA that were gang members and older than me.

A Baby that Became a Leader? Or is it Controllable Anarchy?

This may not have been what people expected. I feel that I did begin as a youth WGA assistant and people did open all kinds of doors to places and experiences… not connections for me back then. Because of the unique experiences and people I got to meet while young, I became unique myself and lead for a variety of “happenings”. Often though, I may have been more of a follower and someone just evolving than people realize. Sometimes it looked like I was the bold one who simply “went first” into things. I may have spoken first. I may have experienced something first. And that was how I lead others. I engaged the experiences first and then if there were followers… they saw how I did it and either tried the same or tried something different. That’s why I can safely say, I was not certain when I had the lead… I may have been following someone else myself or doing what others’ wished. The analogy is like bicyclists or cars on a long tour, and some freely took the lead and also gave it to someone else for a time along the way…sometimes the leading was significant, sometimes meaningless. Some people like bringing up the rear of the pack! Some are even LAZY and rather someone else do the hard focusing of studying the upcoming terrain.

I’ve heard the word “anarchy” applied to life in the United States of America. I tried to ARGUE about this a long time ago. However, now that I’ve lived enough and seen enough I know what the problem is. HUMAN TRAFFICKING actually has broken so many rules and laws within this nation to “solve people problems” it HONESTLY DOES LOOK LIKE ANARCHY. Which means “leaders” are not what they normally are anyway. People use them as they feel like, when they feel like it.

It may have been easier to allow me to lead on some things, maybe a lot of things a long time ago simply because others WANTED TO SEE WHAT I CAME UP WITH. Honestly. Adults watch to see how children do certain things… sometimes adults watch other adults come up with things also. It may not even be a laziness involved. Just a curiosity! Not all children want to try something out or be bold and take the first steps into something. I know I was daring and got used to it at times, and sometimes I was clearly tired and drugged and unaware of what was really going on.

THUS! The Baby may not know what is going on. Some people let babies just crawl and run around even laugh when they get into trouble which is BAD PARENTING, BAD LEADERSHIP, BAD PARTNERING.

A Group of Mexicans or Mexico City People Who Did NOT Move to Russia?

A long time ago I caught some information that a group of Mexicans and/or people of Mexico City and Tijuana were supposed to MOVE TO RUSSIA and work for a leadership person there. It may have even been someone from Firebaugh, CA. This was the 1970s. I recall yelling at someone or maybe a small group in San Diego about this. “NO! Do not hang on me!”

There was a white woman in her 30s or 40s who may have used my identity and moved back to Russia. She was a leadership person from Firebaugh, CA.

It is also rumored that Gene Roddenberry left the U.S. in the 1970s to work in another country where he was more protected. While in the U.S. he himself was badly pestered by Mexicans. Some said I stood in for Gene from time to time AS A MEXICAN TARGETED PERSON. The trouble with me is I was NOT HIRED to work nor with a good income! Even now I don’t have enough to live by myself in San Diego, CA.

Getting Behind the Returning President Donald Trump

I’m still a part of the Joe Biden/ Kamala Harris U.S.A. right now along with so many as they are current leadership. As Donald Trump takes over the White House and presidential duties I will be a good patron of the country and get behind his leadership. It doesn’t mean I’ll agree with everything going on. I’m an older person and non-activist. Whatever I do, it will likely be mellow and passive. I’m actually impressed he worked hard to gather support to make a return to the president’s seat.

This is Donald Trump. He is a leader. He is outspoken and makes things known. He wants people to follow him.

Donald Trump, returning U.S. President. Photo appears online in many articles.

I was TOLD in my youth NOT TO GET HIRED BY Donald Trump. I don’t recall the reason(s). Must have been too charged, possibly dangerous.

Just letting people know I am not planning any in person or remote work for any politicians or executives. It appears I’ve been asked and told to take retirement age and just not be involved. If I look like I’m doing something political it is only as a one-off small person. I have no expectations of others, and I pray no one has expectations of me. I’m in the wilderness and very not informed of inside information. I am living an average person life, and smaller due to the lack of a big family to do things with.

Migrant Leadership in the United States of America? Little Me?

I was caught up with USC (University Southern California) people in the 1970s also. Filmmakers, political young adults. This is never spoken of. I visited the USC campus many times before I was 8 years old. Some thought I’d go there eventually as a college student and get a career with their alumni. It appears a mafia sold me out and I was banned from the campus instead.

I attended a film location scout that involved the United Nations and propaganda. It appeared that I was going to be in the film itself. There was some major conflict involving my identity. Looks like real Russian(?) people were ANGRY that I was a bright child with ideas YET NOT ACTUALLY RUSSIAN. So they told me to “go stand with the United States people” and I did. That actor(?) told me, “We are a country in debt. It may never change. You are a U.S. born child and we want you to be a migrant leadership person.” I thought it was for the movie. Looks like I got caught up very badly with professional entertainment migrants as well as contractor/builders and it is/was VERY REAL all these decades.

Migrant meetings? I was TOLD that is all I had to do, is show up for some migrant meetings. As a youth, I was not certain what that all meant. It appears… I’ve actually been human trafficked all these years and YET DO NOT KNOW ANYONE for real. I don’t have a list of migrants or their leaders to be in contact with. People simply put me on a bus now and then and they made ME LOOK LIKE A MIGRANT. I didn’t speak with people. I was like a mascot, a pet, a toy, a flag bearer who could not actually do much for anyone and my own funding was very low like a migrant worker who came over a border into the U.S.A. So I got kidnapped and trafficked and somehow migrants were told to follow me around (1970s and 80s)? I basically was taken places, and the workers followed and they did all the talking and deal-making and I got MUGGED over and over again. Silenced.

I’m not as bad off these days, however I’m still not a leadership person with money to hire people. I still do not have a contact list of leaders and workers from any company or organization. Nothing. I believe I am very done with people as I was TOLD to take “retirement age” at 50 years old if I do not have a contract. I do not have a contract for or from others. I am just living a very simple boring life. No one has asked for me to step up and speak with a group. The last time that happened for real was in my youth. I’ve been attacked by gang members by force and injury as well as druggings–just before I was to speak anywhere–even in a high school classroom. So public speaking was out for me and has been for decades. Very real gang leaders likely knew I couldn’t handle managing migrant workers. They may have sabotaged me from any of the related duties just so the migrant workers sought other leaders who can handle or manage them.

This is yet another online writing I had not planned on. Am hoping that coming clean on what I know about helps people MOVE ON FROM ME and seek help and leadership from those who are far more enabled.

Tammuz, the Cross and Shepherd

I am a beginner in Theology. I am writing out what I am learning and discovering. This writing is subject to future editing and updating.

Tammuz is the both the name of the Cross in Christian literature and culture as well as the name of an ancient deity in Babylon that was a shepherd. Centuries later, in the days of Jesus of Nazareth, the Tammuz was a symbol to be feared not embraced.

The story of Jesus Christ as written is about a man who actually sinned in the eyes of the government of his time, and he was violently bound to Tammuz, the Cross as a shepherd of people… a false leader to the formal, organized government of the peoples he was born of.

Was Jesus Christ holy himself? Is he a deity? A human being to be worshiped and followed?

The message Jesus Christ told his followers and general public is that he was dying for the sins of all people. What is not spoken of enough, is that he was labeled a sinner, a real criminal to a whole region of people, beyond his cities and nation. All leaderships (including some of his own followers) voted and insisted he needed to pass away violently and publicly. That is disturbing! As he carried a heavy cross–one of the biggest and heaviest ever through the town he was jeered at, yelled at, spat upon and people turned away from him.

What did we not understand of the message of he, this Jesus of Nazareth? His daily life was to beg for money, food and places to sleep at night. He was NOT known to ask for work. He was also shown to create great miracles to impress and scare people. He worked to turn people away from the local and state government laws and follow his own way of doing things. He essentially created a cult following and performed what in those days was considered witchcraft and black magic–both condemned by high authorities as near as Israel and far as Egypt and across the Ottoman Empire.

What were called miracles in the time of Jesus of Nazareth were known also as black magic and witchcraft. In Egypt, only very educated high officials were allowed by government to perform these extraordinary acts.

Certainly his mother cried for him. He was her son. In today’s world it could be interpreted that he was a creation of her, though The Bible that has his story says, he was NOT her real son, just a son of God. (I wonder now, did he ever pray to the cross or Tammuz for help instead of the One God of the Jews or Egyptians who mostly prayed to the Sun God?)

“Immaculate conception.” Clear creation? Was Jesus Christ an invention of the government to teach people in person what they do not want people to do? Is it possible he and his story is propaganda?

I wonder openly about Jesus Christ, Jesus of Nazareth… if he never performed black magic or something that looked like witchcraft in his time he would have lived to an old age instead of a violent death bound to Tammuz before he was middle aged? He appears to have died for his sins, sacrificed for his sins as leader in activism.

Would Jesus Christ have been so named if he were not most shamefully bound to Tammuz in death? Would he have been such an important figure in religious literature if he hadn’t gone to the maximum sentencing by the government of his time?

If Jesus did live, do we need him back again? Do we all need someone new to live on planet Earth and “die for all our sins” as they and we “pray to god”?

A Simple View of Leadership in a Nation

It may be well known in very civilized countries that military leaders, government leaders tend to spend more time with other forms of leaders and are disciplining higher criminals(who are likely leaders).

Average and below average people are normally left to do their work for their family, community and the nation. If they break a law they are taken to a civilian court of law for the correct disciplinary action, the usual goal is to correct something and return the individual to society again.