I would have been much happier working on creative works with a small team of people. I couldn’t get that to happen. TOO MUCH HISTORY. I’ve been a ghost in the wilderness so long, people forgot I existed and didn’t know who I was when I showed up for L.A. court time in recent years. People actually did not recognize me nor speak to me like I thought they would. I AM TOO DEAD EVEN THERE. Guess I am supposed to be!
It is okay to be dead to work people. It means I have no commitments to them too. No gang members chatted me up either, so no commitments to L.A. gangs either.
I am still ill and weak. It’s just as well no one wants me for work anywhere. Not well enough anyway. I’m starting to adjust my own goals for upcoming years, like being more practical and lowering expectations for myself. I’m having to embrace the real kind of retirement and retirement age and probably need to. I simply took on too many hits in life, tougher ones and more than I thought possible. Recent health problems is forcing me to rethink how to handle my future. I don’t feel as fearless as I used to. I have greater worry now.
Let me add to the ‘wind’ on this. More memory has come back. The 1970s were a very dark time for many, and I got caught up in it. Being promised for courthouse time decades later may have saved my life. What may have changed A LOT is that I NEVER BECAME A GANG LEADERSHIP PERSON FOR REAL OR WIFE OF ONE. It looked like I may have had that as a possible path back in the 1970s. I got promised to appear, to be shoved around… however I have arrived all these decades later with very little holdings… I am not holding people or money, not even got a good hold on my own life. I do not even have the same nicknames and regular contacts at all. My home is in a different state.
I had a lot more potential future in the 1970s. Now I have a history of a damaged, ruined life. It is NOT the same big picture.
I never worked for them. A long time ago an Asian man in his late 40s/early 50s(?) told me he was retiring from BYCORP and had been using my name(not this pen name, something else). This took place in the 1980s I believe. This was at the raw land location site of the future new Gaylord/Marriott Resort.
I also suffered A LOT already. One of the Joshua’s knew I was going to be retired young and kept from workplaces until old enough if ever. He was ANGRY about it and swore to make me miserable. He probably did the wrong thing and gathered people, including BYCORP people to work against me, kidnap me, slander and get me into a lot of trouble while young. So instead of getting to know a lot of people over time, I was minimized and injured, drugged* a lot. People stayed away and I sat at home bewildered, confused, upset and food insecure.
It was said a LONG TIME AGO… that mafia should not put hits on me because I didn’t have the appropriate access to funds to pay anyone off. And I was NOT a CAA member either. It meant I was not connected tightly to people in Hollywood. All I was allowed to do was STAND IN for others. I was not given a long term identity to use in the entertainment business.
Standing in for others: It may have made me more of a target than I realized. I never really knew what was going on because I WAS TOO UNADOPTED. People were NOT telling me what was going on, warning me about anything or anyone. I sometimes was drugged in school or out in public, woke up on a sound stage or film location and I just winged it what was going on! More than once I had amnesia and had to ask “Who am I to these people here?” And it was truth. I was smuggled to some movie location scouts and didn’t know anyone.
Because of my history, I cannot just get up my courage and small money and pursue work with people in the entertainment business. I’ve been forced out a long time ago. I wish to note: The Kushner Law Offices may have been one of the teams HIRED and THREATENED to NOT allow me a real position in Hollywood. In the 1970s, they were a bunch of migrants in and out of those offices. They were all gang members and had agendas. I was not actually planned for!
*Sometimes it was toxins more than some drug a gang member gave me.
I appear to be forced as a sea hag, crazy Steven and now retired from that “work history” and there is a refusal to flip me back to who I was prior to those things.
The ‘wind’ has been alive with COMPLAINTS this morning. Admitting Mexican mafia got German people to use me for their people and to help Mexico. The main complaint is big gangsters have retired me and people ARE NOT USING THE REPLACEMENTS… the gang members who replaced me. I wish to note they are not the opposite of sea hag or crazy Steven. Some actually look like gang bangers, tough people.
Prior to being labeled crazy Steven and a sea hag… I was a baby, a youth… treated like a kidnapped executive/executive child with many doors open in Honolulu, HI and much further through connections and contacts. Obviously that young I could not use them or know them on an adult level yet.
This is where the reminder to people I went down with more than one 747 jetliner in the 1970s, named the PGA (Producers Guild of America).. and was not able to return to make a little adjustment so it didn’t conflict with the golf organization’s name. I also sat with Arnold Palmer or his imposter and we created a drink… It may not be a rumor that I got to be a captain on at least one U.S. space shuttle mission in person on board the spacecraft before I was old enough for a common automobile drivers license. Should we discuss APPLE Computer Inc.’s origins with the BEATLES? I may have NAMED Neil Gaiman too, btw. None of this was obvious because gangsters grabbed the ideas and used them, carried them, shepherd them, gambled on them, made money on them–and I did not.
The ‘wind’ was alive, not with the Sound of Music this morning. Complaining I was NOT BABY JAWS, that I was JAWS in the 1970s and had saved thousands of lives, including criminal ones, political ones. My response is, “NO, I know who was the BIG JAWS. He was mrdrd before I was an adult. He looked like a Donald Trump, older one. HE was JAWS in person to many. May not have been wealthy. I may have been his spirit animal though.”
No one appears even interested in flipping me back to the person I should(or could?) have been. The likely reason is COMPETITION is still around, alive, causing a conflict and has paid and threatened to be bigger than me all these decades. They may be insisting they stay bigger than me no matter what, even if they are quite small in society.
Rumor is Matt Ridge paid Mexicans in the 1970s to hush, smother, clobber, hold me down and small. I don’t know the truth. Could have been other people that hired him to do it. I know there is definitely some conflict going on even in San Diego, CA. Could it be over a job? Position in society? I am not certain. Whatever it is, I am small… very small for the soul and spirit and things I have lived through. It means people need to still get the gang members who are more well known in public places for needs, wants. I am still a “mafia invalid”, “mafia disabled”.
Pure acknowledgement for those who have known me even in passing through as a visitor to places. I AM ONE OF THE ORIGINAL “Genius Christ” people of a certain Los Angeles, California courthouse. I rocked the courthouse with others in the spirit of literature, history, open speech making, storytelling, oral presentations and problem solving think tank. Full acknowledgement of what is legal and illegal, and day-lighting cheats and cheating. Have not attended fully since 1977 or so. If I came back at all it was while held in possession by gangsters’ people and I was not active in the participation, did not add anything, was not introduced to others. Others have used the nickname genius christ more than I ever did. I’m not certain if I used the nickname itself since the 1970s.
Yes, “Genius Christ” was also a parody of a “Jesus Christ” characterization. Meant to be in good humor not blasphemy of a religious person. A different human being entirely.
Update: There have been many things happened since this post and the original it links to. I’ve been compelled to write more autobiographically and describe what has being going on. Life and warnings. I’m also backing off now on writing online. I appear to not have retired enough to appease others. Don’t know what all is going on with them nor who they are, to be honest.
I may be returning to Mother Earth themes in the future of my online publishing. Just focusing on health, body, the lands we live on, cultivation, herbalism, organics, gardening(?) even thinking spiritually about people and living. Read entire post here…
As I write this, there is a historical debate going on. It is between Kamala Harris a black or Indian woman and Donald Trump very white man*. They are after the highest seat in United States of America politics. I’ve heard the debate is not going well. I watched a couple of minutes… looked great! Here’s why.
They are actually listening to what each other is saying and coming up with their own answers. Some answers may be very old and very repeated, some are not at all, right? What matters is that are NOT matching eye to eye at all, they are very different people.
What may be interesting to some people is that over one hundred years ago… any colored skin person in the United States appeared to be below white people no matter how bad or evil they were. And people KNEW this was a mistake.
It has taken so long for people to make some corrections in the NATURE of this country.
I don’t want to comment on the debate itself. I feel it is wrong to do so. I want to sit back and see what happens. WHO actually gets the Oval Office. Can you imagine? If Kamala wins, this is a complete FLIP of the “old United States”. If Donald wins, I am not certain of our future path. He has demonstrated a very negative attitude from pre-1900s.
What worries me is this is about a top seat, a very important seat. I am not convinced Kamala owns it. Donald may come out above her because of his longer history with people globally. He can connect with the “white world” better than Kamala can. She is a strong force. So is he.
What could happen is she stays in politics one way or another. That would still be a win. If she gets the big office, fine. If she doesn’t fine. If Donald gets is and brings more of the pre-1900s ethos and mentality… the U.S.A. still has some growing to do and may have to run yet more “colored” people toward the presidential seat(s). Not give up, please. The world is round-enough to be including so many colors globally that “white” is almost a minority.
*COLORS??? Oh I feel terrible and not. Humans still need to be able to make associations for negative and positive thinking. We DO still have to speak of history by way of witnessing “whites” and “colors”. These are superficial ways of knowing a person. It does point at DNA and history. Be educated when you think of “look” to help define a person. This is ONLY THE BEGINNING of the conversation about someone. Average knowledge is working off very simple old history. Educated knowledge… is knowing about the individual and who they know and who knows them and WHAT THEY THEMSELVES have done in history. Cool, huh?
I used to be more outspoken in public places about political things… issues, people, places, events. It may disappoint people that I am not back at it. Please note I have been badly attacked by gang members in the past and my jaw is actually not 100% right now. Old injury.
THIS IS A RANT FOR PUBLIC VIEWING. I know not all had dumb and sinister intentions, but some truly have! Their names may not even be on credits anywhere. Some may even be dead from a street fight at some point by now.
After I helped create the Fast and Furious movie franchise… in my childhood… WITH ADULTS… how many MEN, gangsters especially… suddenly rose up and WANTED TO “BE ME”? No kidding. HOW MANY? They REALLY FKD UP MY LIFE. OTHERS TOO. Because some ARE NOT LEGAL IN THE U.S., NEVER WERE. They got involved and messed up all kinds of normal people who USED TO work for Hollywood, and I don’t think this was appropriate. Some, maybe many… are not even creative or business people, had guns, not money. This is NOT what the movie series was about. It wasn’t about destroying lives. It was supposed to enforce family and friendship values. And hell yes, have good times. Criminal and not.
Offscreen… Even g’damn criminal politicians got involved or showed up at that series. So WTF happened???????
