Author: Sarah "Lusor" Spielberg

This saying is actually for local and national politics. People use it close to home also. Basically saying, “No, not around me this won’t happen.”

I have something else to remind us all about, a very different application of this saying. Some people’s self, life, even very real back yard intentionally look down-played, less-impressive, even ruined on purpose. I have a feeling the “rug has been pulled out from under them” and local leadership people have oppressed them, and let them know not to be impressive. I’m doing a little prayer here on this for me and others:

We have not always been given the guidelines, we just got picked on and picked on until it got so bad we were laying on the ground not moving, barely breathing and not enough money for average food during the month.*

What happens is these people end up applying another use of NiMBY and trying to look unimpressive in different ways… probably hoping they won’t be picked on. It may be happening throughout the nation in workplaces also. There may be many millions of people self-sabotaging themselves globally just so they are not picked on or misused.

This use of NiMBY may actually be causing a lot of people to not strive, not work hard, not do well, not think well, not care about themselves and all kinds of things around them. It is a form of counter culture that local and government leaders may actually be causing to exist and flourish. It is VERY COMPLICATED as to when this is necessary and when it is not, and how much should exist? I’ve traveled enough when I was young to have seen when this attitude–a form of social engineering–makes sense and when it does not. I’m not a scholar on the subject, just have witnessed and experienced it. It does exist.

*This has happened to me at different times in my life even when I had no job, few friends, old clothes, a small place to live in and a shrunken stomach from regular poor person’s eating. I wasn’t doing it to myself, it was put upon me. HERE IN THE U.S.A.

I’m bringing this up because it truly appears people tried to make me look like a real migrant in the U.S.A. who is expected TO LEAVE when they don’t have good connections or work here. I couldn’t just leave and go elsewhere(I’m a U.S. citizen to the IRS and government), and I also could not get help from real or fake family members which I ACTUALLY HAVE. I was forced to look like something I was not for decades. That is why I am a bit ANGRY about recent events in past years.

Old Spaces, New Ideas

Surprisingly, I was inspired to write this because I am NOT TRYING TO INFLUENCE and yet bring up something else connected to the idea of NiMBY. Without saying where and who was involved… There was a micro-ecosystem at a shopping mall that a possible employee influenced or created themselves. It appears to have been there for decades and was removed completely within recent months. The ecosystem they had created was not important looking and they may have been afraid to because not all malls have the same situation in their back yard. (Fear of competitions’ vandalism?) I wonder if someone with more clout has decided to “kill it” or will endorse it to come back being more important looking than the original one. There is a lesson in this small space:

Will criminal-minded people vandalize a good looking garden space made for wildlife because it looks too good to be created by the maker(s) and host(s)?

That’s just a garden space. What about a city or a town? A nation? Where are the guidelines and limits?

I’m wondering. It may be more than for Hollywood and California.

AND… WHO IS GOING TO STEP UP AND REMIND PEOPLE that someone thinks I’m “Donovan” somehow… a male who trafficks people and makes a lot of money?

Some people that know me in person very well may be laughing at this post. The truth hurts though.

I bring THIS ALL UP because are people expecting ME to “bring drugs” or “help people get work in the U.S.?” Because IT HAS BEEN ASKED OF ME OFF AND ON MY WHOLE LIFE. Even now there are likely MIGRANTS snooping and hovering/stalking me when I’m out in public. I do not have drugs or drug money, nor can I connect people with all kinds of things like a real gang member can. And because I AM SO WORTHLESS IN SOCIETY*… why am I picked on at all?

*Worthless in society because I do not have drugs or drug money nor can I help people get connected for work or much of anything. I sound like an invalid, huh?

Btw. Did the drug runner who replaced me in so many places also replace me at Jefferey Epstein’s island? I’m not complaining, just saying… that’s possibly who people decided they needed more than me to chat with in their social and professional circles.

I want this to be known. If you don’t force people to get into the car, they may never get driven crazy. Conversely, if you force people into a car and force that car to do very abnormal things… you may “drive them crazy”… them… being the people on board. “Car” may or may not be a metal vehicle with wheels.

Now I just fed you some food for thought.

I really should be doing something else than writing a whole lot on a blog site. I have not done this my whole life, so I’m getting caught up. Honestly, I could spend years doing it and I don’t really want to. So I am trying to write up, condense and spend more time doing anything else!

I feel a little crazy. I’ve been physically beat up and/or injured by at least 10 different people in life even before I could ride a bicycle and spell my whole name out. I am not even certain what my original name was before I was allowed to create a “professional Hollywood name” that I gave to a prison special before I was in preschool. By the time I was ten years old I had actually DIED–stopped breathing–and was brought back to life a few times. This is barely the snow dusting the tip of the iceberg. Does this make me Mexican, Russian, Ukrainian, Korean, Japanese or Yugoslavian? I have a feeling I reached levels far above your ordinary U.S. citizen and I AM GLAD. I am retired though. I was REPLACED a long time ago by men, women, children of various gender associations…. they got adopted and spoken to regularly about anything and I got put out of order and into the wilderness, excommunicated. If you don’t believe it, HOW MANY PEOPLE ATTEND MY BIRTHDAY PARTIES? Yah? Huh? What year, you say? Geez. My identity got so stolen while young, the date I use may not be the correct one anyway.

I do not know if the information is good now. And, writing it here may not change anything. Doubt I could get him in person because I have been gone from those higher circles DECADES. I’ve been mugged so many times, football players have blushed… which could mean there are THAT MANY PEOPLE who would stand between me and him. How many? 5…30… more?

I will say, perhaps people need to let Elon make some decisions? Mafia decades ago had a way of just telling people what they wanted and having things happen so they could pocket money even if a small part of it and it cost more money to create it–I don’t blame them for having this method or way of thinking. It may be how they survived and continue to. Sustainability was not a word people liked to use unless it meant their cash flow continued to please them.

I wrote in a recent post that people may need Mamie. I am not certain which one(s) can handle Elon and that level of executives who also have knowledge dating prior to companies and corporations being start up.

I am in the wilderness. I am someone who has said, “Conditions have changed” many times and people need to get this. I am not a leadership person even if I did while some things were in a start up phase in the 1970s an 80s. It can also mean some of the things I was going to bring up, messaging I was asked to deliver is OLD. I may actually hold OLD INFORMATION that is not that important these days since it is so far into the future. I myself AM DATED, OLD.

Update: Thinking more on it, I may have gotten back to an early “Elon” in the 1970s or 80s. I may have actually gotten a message through, however I cannot guarantee I got the correct Elon. Likely it had to do with mafia funding. It is so many years, decades into the future now I have no real idea what things are now.

Here is why. I’ve been accused of impostering her, and I had no idea what was going on. No one said this since the 1970s or 80s. A long time ago a German man held, married…? An older part Japanese woman and pointed at her in front of me said he was pretending he married me. I feel OTHER MEN did this also and nicknamed their wife or girlfriend “Mamie”. I NEVER USE THAT NAME.

I heard about it in the 1980s that a “Mamie” was WRITING FOR ELON MUSK… and I was not invited to take over even though she wanted me to give some ideas. That was the last time I heard about it. I really have NOT BEEN INVOLVED.

Short answer: Why don’t gang members ask “Mitch” and “Bigger Mitch” about being bigger then me since the 1970s, perhaps before I was born?

My response: No, it is not me. I held more than one name in the 1970s+ and gang members belonging to…. to… _______… worked in Los Angeles and other places and exported the money to… _______? And that’s about it. I was a talented looking youth who swapped places with less wealthy and also much wealthier people in the 1970s and 80s. They (over 100+ people?) were all likely known at Mar A Lago, as I was back then.

I was MUGGED, deemed too weak to do the work MIGRANTS were more capable of. I even got labeled a “migrant” while in L.A. more than once in the 1970s.

People must not have been watching. I got “killed”. Meaning “thrown out” of key connection circles and then I was just floating, drifting for a very long time and treated very poorly like a third class citizen. I was NOT living in good places and well cared for. Some thought I looked LOWER THAN Firebaugh, CA workers… which was not a lie: Some/many of them were actually cared for. They ate well, got education including college and jobs in society.

I did appear at times to “stand and deliver” and then I left those places, usually forever. I likely looked like a migrant or daughter of one. I was often dismissed, and over and over again. Key gang members, even lower leadership people refused to pay me any money and bring me into their own circles of contacts and connections.

The reason likely is in the 1970s… a “Joshua” insisted and threatened he “be me for L.A.”. He looked like a brown Mexican man in his teens or 20s. Back then “white people” were hiring Mexicans more than other white people. So I assumed he got the higher circles of contacts while I just drifted most of my life not doing much at all.

I’ve written about this before: I was also treated like a girlfriend or wife of a variety of men and women in the 1970s and 80s. Some never knew who I actually was. Others may have stepped in before or after I left places.

“People paid to be more important than this woman.” – the ‘wind’

My response: Could be, I don’t know who is who or how wealthy and important they already are. I’ve been very ruined in life, and did not accomplish much for myself. Likely the average college graduate and migrant worker with a job looks better than me out in society! What I fear still is that there are actual POOR MIGRANTS who paid or coerced gang members to help them look better than me, and they simply beat me up and made certain I never got a job–instead of boosting those poor people. I got made LOWER and more POOR instead of they getting more money and actual clout in society. It could be why people do not want me doing much out in public. I’ve actually been escorted by gang members out of certain shopping malls when I was a lot younger and I had no idea what was going on. Someone thought I looked important just window shopping? Or was it upsetting YET ANOTHER GROUP that I could not afford anything at the mall?

Where I am at today is I am on a low income, cannot by myself afford a 1br apartment in San Diego County. I hope this makes someone feel better about themselves.

I hope this is an adequate admission to why I am falling short of expectations now and permanently. Enabled to get to all kinds of places to visit in the 1970s and 80s, caused too much damage to my own body and life. It was a risk I embraced because life at home wasn’t safe either. I don’t recommend most youths take the path I tried out! It required a special commitment of many people to help me do it, as well as my own. Because I did so much field work, and I wish to call it this… while young, my body never recovered enough to be full health. Even that got wrapped in slander and other covers all these decades. I faced unique experiences and learned things, however I paid for it with a variety of life damage. I don’t suggest others be this person. I hope for you all to have better lives. Stay closer to home, focus on your local life and people.

Explorers do the in person field work in distant lands. I was one. I’m stronger and weaker in different ways than someone who has remained in their home town for decades. I was NOT a migrant worker trying out different countries. One of my sponsors was the actual U.S. government through some people there.

I have perspectives others may not. Some may be very dated, some eternal. This is probably why local and distant gang members are still trying to use me in a variety of ways. Truth is they are attempting to use me like a non-local politician who is not in a public office. I can’t really do this now. I am not healthy enough. I’m limping along in more than one way.

Wish I could, know I should not for the foreseeable future. I’ve shut down that part of me because I don’t want to be targeted as opinionated and overstepping the status(?) I have in society right now. It actually appears lower than possibly thousands of migrant workers in the U.S. I am worried about gang members harassing me over my own shared thoughts about things going on. There is a lot I do not know about, and a lot of people I’ve never met. There is a lot going on in the U.S. as well as the world. I just have to sit back and watch.

Can we all accept this? I sometimes barely get through my own days at home without a pain or fatigue or other ailment reminding me I am not well enough to be a champion or even pretend one for others. I no longer have the strength and energy it takes to “stand and deliver” well for anything, anywhere. It is depressing. Have a feeling this is TRUTH for others also.

If you know what an arcade game is… table top or stand up… if there is any corruption or damage in the programming… the game may only be able to play the simple parts, only the first few levels… and the advanced ones that take up more memory and resources of the system… cannot function. Some games get so messed up they can barely run the insert coin and intro splash screens over and over… and no matter who puts in a coin… the game is too broken to actually run.

Heh.. don’t get me started about robots that fight… Just go watch some movies. This is where I am redirecting people BACK TO MARC SCOTT ZICREE. Even if he is not your go to for Oscar award winning content, he can elaborate on what I’ve written about. Someone like him KNOWS A LOT MORE PEOPLE. And that is the key thing. Some people who DID GOOD WORK a long time ago got phased out simply because OTHERS wanted to step in and get the involvement.

I’m actually in the wilderness, and I am damaged. There are others like me I am certain. Not all can write about things like I have. I am sharing on their behalf also.

Update (next morning): Chatter on the ‘wind’ this morning. I sense nodding heads, and younger people having to explain to non-gamers. I credit the ‘wind’ on this one: “Don’t play damaged games.” And they were hinting I am like a damaged system that people do not know. the ‘wind’ is adding, “She is a retired system. Looks important. Formerly important. Not in service now.” My response is, yes, that is an adequate description. I am NOT FULLY FUNCTIONAL, this is key. On board damage I need to be handled with care. I won’t explode, however if something goes too wrong other systems may power up. I do spend most of my time in hibernation mode or close to it. I’ve diverted too much energy on splash screens in recent years to remind people I may not be “the console or game” they think or thought I am. Someone, including me, built on many “handler codes” and even “wrappers” decades ago.

I am one of the Ready Player babies. There is too much TROUBLE and DANGER for me to participate again. It could be why 2 and 3 may not go into production until they find replacements for ME AND OTHER BABIES. What may surprise people is that I originally WAS NOT SUPPOSED TO BE. It looked like a Taiwanese or other Asian boy in the 1970s. He was NOT READY ENOUGH, and I had already some WGA training, so I stepped up and into some things that may have put me in grave danger for a long time, though truly helping many other systems people did not plan on.

Update (later): the ‘wind’ is admitting gang members were mugging certain types of people and were paid to do it. That I’m one of many who was [targeted very young]. Also that there was NEVER a plan for me to recover fully and work for real. Deals were made a long time ago for others to work and they fought hard to get those jobs which appeared to be ones I could have done myself. I cannot step into them at all full time, it has not been arranged. Some are still working AND HAVE TO as a result of what was arranged a long time ago.

It IS NOT ARRANGED for me to be a “virtual person for others to use”. Right now. I did warn people on Twitter in 2020 not to be “Russian married” to me because I needed a clear channel to let people know what was going on with me personally! I was being very misidentified and unable to be something for others out in public places. I was actually trapped and stuck into a path I did not want and had not much ability to be original in. It made me look like many other people, I could tell. And I had to re-meet people who may have known me for decades who had PROGRAMMING on how to handle me. It was NOT GOOD in some ways. What’s not arranged is that I was given “retirement age of 50” AND there is NO WORK-LOOKING AGENDA for me to work on while at home–that simple. No one is reaching out to me to do something for them, not even small. I am ghosted again! It likely means the fake surrogates are just busy doing their things and I’ve actually CYCLED OUT AND AWAY back into the wilderness like I mostly have been in life.